How to Make Really Good Guacamole, Unless You Hate Avocados, Then I Meant to Say "How to Make Really Nasty Guacamole"

Guacamole is one of those things you either love or hate. I really love it. I know people who really hate it. I think it's because of the avocados. Avocados are like Ronald Reagan. You either love him or hate him.

You Will Need:

Image courtesy of Grant Cochrane | FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Mainly because my guacamole isn't as pretty as this.

• 2 avocados
• onion (you'll probably only need like ¼ of a large one)
• tomato (get one or two of those little pear tomatoes or whatever the call the little egg-shaped ones)
• 1 ½ tablespoons lime juice
• ½ cup of salsa verde (it's like regular salsa but it's green)

What To Do:

1. Dice the onion until you have ¼ cup of it. 
2. Dice the tomato. You need ¼ cup of tomatoes too.
3. Cut open the avocados. Take out the pits and either grow them into an avocado trees, toss them, or put them in the . Scoop out the gooshy green stuff and put it in a bowl. Smoosh it all up with a fork.
4. Stir in the onion, tomato, lime juice, and salsa. 
5. If you like avocados, eat it all by yourself with a fork or get some chips and share with other avocado-lovers.
6. If you hate avocados, give it to someone who likes avocados and make yourself some cheese dip instead.

Yummmm...or ewww, whichever.

How to Make the World's Best Brownies

Brownies around here are a staple, like bread. The only thing that might be more important is cookies. This is the easy version of brownies. Later, I'll post the more gourmet version. Ha ha, gourmet. As if. 

You Will Need:

• One small package of instant devil's food cake chocolate pudding
• Two cups of cold milk
• A devil's food cake mix
• One 12 oz bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips
• A tub of icing in any flavor you like. I used chocolate the first time and strawberry the second time. Most people seem to like the chocolate better.

What To Do:

1. Preheat the oven to the temperature specified on the cake mix box.
2. Mix the instant chocolate pudding with the cold milk per the instructions on the box. 
3. Add the cake mix and mix well. If you don't, you might not mix it thoroughly. 
4. Stir in the bag of chocolate chips.
5. Spread the mix into a well-greased cake pan (I used a 9 x 11 inch) and bake until knife or toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean (I baked them for thirty minutes, but it was in a toaster oven and at a low altitude; you may need to adjust your cooking time accordingly). 
6. Once the brownies are done, allow them to cool. 
7. When they are cool, spread the icing all over the cake as thick as you please.

Mmmmm! They are soooo chocolatey!